🏀 One minute video summary of Lonzo Ball’s preseason debut /// Noh’s Notebook

I’m so freakin’ excited for Lonzo Ball getting back on the court in a Bulls uniform. I don’t have any lofty expectations, of course, just seeing him on the court again and hopefully make it through a season (even on a minutes restriction) would be a success. Like Noh mentioned, Ball’s feel for the game on both ends of the floor is excellent so I can’t wait to see that on display again. And honestly, just being on the floor after the long away is a victory, both mentally and physically.

🎙️ The Undefinable with Michael Allred /// Off Panel Podcast

This whole interview is so good. Allred is a legend and Harper does a great job interviewing here and getting nugget after nugget of gold.

🎧 What Should a Music Magazine Be in the TikTok Era? Pitchfork Alumni Have an Idea. /// NYT

I’ve been eagerly awaiting the music version of Defector/404 since everything went down at Pitchfork and it’s finally here in the form of Hearing Things. Excited to see what they do.

🗳️ What the Polls Really Say About Black Men’s Support for Kamala Harris /// New Yorker

It’s worth remembering that Black men voted for Clinton in 2016 at a level that surpassed white women by thirty-six points.

Might be an unpopular opinion, but blaming any group of people is stupid. I’ve heard white women say they think women are too emotional to be president—which is idiotic. And as a white guy, if any group is to blame, it’s the ones who vote over 50% for the spray tanned nincompoop. There are, hands down, more white men that vote against their own interest than any other demographic.

🔫 NRA chief involved in gruesome cat killing as college fraternity member /// Guardian

Are we really surprised that someone obsessed with guns is cool torturing and killing a cat?

🚕 Tesla’s sporty, two-seater robotaxi design puzzles experts /// Reuters

In their defense, when you get a cab in the city, you’re probably stuck with just the backseat—but that still gives room for three. Ridiculous that they are just like, “yeah, two seats is good.” So much for “forward thinking.”

🛰️ NASA set to launch Europa Clipper probe to search for signs of habitability /// New Scientist

This is pretty cool.

🏥 We’re Turning Our Emergency Room into a Spirit Halloween /// McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

Of course, I get it–this seems drastic. But let’s face it, rural hospitals like ours are barely hanging on. Medicare plans drown us in paperwork, making it impossible to turn a profit unless we start offering luxury VIPappendectomies with complimentary champagne. Meanwhile, private insurance companies are busy collecting premiums while doctors are stuck on the phone chasing prior authorizations, leaving little time to care for their patients. The result? Patients fighting to survive in a system that’s barely functioning. Talk about spooky.

Talk about efficiencies. Helloooo nurse.

👨‍💻 HTML for People

Been meaning to link to this since Blake launched it, but it’s been hectic. As someone who only knows a tiny bit of HTML from tinkering with this site template on Blot, I’m super stoked to dig into all of this and actually start to understand how all of this works.

🌌 The Move /// Omeleto

This is the kind of stuff I’m really hoping to cover more of over on foofaraw. I love short films, but it’s often hard to find good ones.

via

🚗 Tesla reveals 20 Cybercabs at We, Robot event, says you’ll be able to buy one for less than $30,000 /// TechCrunch

Musk also noted he expects Tesla to start doing “unsupervised FSD in Texas and California next year” with the Model 3 and Model Y. He acknowledged that he’s too optimistic about timelines, but said he expects the Cybercab to be in production by 2026 or “before 2027.”

I’m sure everyone already knows this, but anything Musk says is bullshit.

📱 TikTok is designed to be addictive to kids and causes them harm, US states’ lawsuits say /// AP News

More than a dozen states and the District of Columbia filed lawsuits against TikTok on Tuesday, saying that the popular short-form video app is designed to be addictive to kids and harms their mental health.

🤪 We’ve gone insane /// End On End

I’ll be honest, I didn’t read the study Jason looks at here, but I trust him not to mislead. And he’s right, we’ve gone insane. The immigration topic (for most, I’m sure you and your dad are the exception) has never been about jobs, money, opportunity, or crime—it’s always been about race.

📔 Trump’s ‘God Bless the USA’ Bibles were printed in China, AP review finds /// AP News

How surprising… 🙄 Probably made the same place his “Swiss” watches are. So much for America First. To make matters worse, I think Nebraska is buying tons of these for their schools 🤮

⚽ Jürgen Klopp: Ex-Liverpool boss takes Red Bull soccer job /// ESPN

It was only a matter of time. People who go through the grind like that tend to love the grind so sitting at home never made sense. I imagine this will be lower stress than managing while still allowing him to be part of the game. I give it two years tops before he’s managing again though.

💽 Dookie Demastered /// Green Day

Pretty incredible stuff albeit impractical. Although, I wouldn’t mind having the doorbell one.

🎞️ Letterboxd besties

No one had the same top four as me, but one person shared three!

⚾️ MLB’s Television Product Is Getting Shittier In Exciting New Ways /// Defector

Across all sports, we need more in-game commercials. You think I’m crazy, but hear me out. Games are so over long with extended commercial breaks for time outs and half-times. But what if they weren’t. Look at hockey and soccer—entire periods of play. Amazing!Now I know the networks and leagues will never give up money, they’d inevitably add in-game commercials on top of the existing ones, but I prefer to be optimistic and think one day we can have nice things and enjoy them.

🎼 Pink Floyd Sells Music Rights to Sony for $400 Million /// Yahoo

Roger Waters doesn’t seem like a great person so I’m a bit ambivalent about this. I still don’t understand the economics of these big music deal rights given how little streaming services pay. I guess over the super long term it’s good since once it’s paid off, it’s free money, but the time it takes to get to that ROI has to be crazy.

🛬 Boeing Will Cut 17,000 Jobs in Bid to Slash Costs /// NYT

When your planes start falling apart in the sky, what do you do? Cut costs, of course!

🔥 Bonfire on the Mountains /// Kinopio

Friend of the Variable and foofaraw contributor Tony Tran is going all in on Inktober doing three different drawings across three different styles. Every. Single. Day. And he’s recording them in this Kinopio space. Incredible stuff.

✨ Kazuaki Koseki’s Dreamy Photos Capture Japan’s Forests Shimmering with Fireflies /// Colossal

Some gorgeous photos.

🍆 God’s Penis Visible In Night Sky For First Time In Millennia /// Onion News Network

Apologies for anyone not thrilled to see this heading pop-up, but the Onion News Network is back with a splash 🤣

📽️ Livestreaming classic cinema /// One Thing

I really want to subscribe to the Criterion Channel again, but I don’t think I can convince the wife to watch enough to get my moneys worth…